Liberation Education Newsletter

Liberation Education Newsletter

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Liberation Education Newsletter
Season of Self—The Power of Radical Acceptance
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Season of Self—The Power of Radical Acceptance

How self-acceptance dismantles the need for perfection and opens the door to true transformation.

Desireé B Stephens's avatar
Desireé B Stephens
Feb 26, 2025
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Liberation Education Newsletter
Liberation Education Newsletter
Season of Self—The Power of Radical Acceptance
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The Moment I Stopped Fighting Myself

There’s a moment after you stop fighting yourself where something shifts. It’s quiet, gentle even. The voices of criticism soften, and suddenly, you realize that growth doesn’t require constant battle—it requires surrender.

I had one of those moments last week as I sat on the floor folding laundry, overwhelmed but also oddly at peace. I didn’t force myself to push through. I just sat there, breathing, accepting that I didn’t have to be "productive" to be worthy.

It was a stark contrast to the years spent believing that self-acceptance was something I had to earn—something I could only claim once I had perfected myself, healed every wound, and become the most polished version of me. But that was supremacy culture talking. The lie that if we are not constantly improving, we are failing.

But what if we didn’t need fixing?

What if radical acceptance was not the end of growth, but the very thing that allows it?

Take a deep breath. How would it feel in your body to truly accept yourself in this moment? What would soften? What tension could you release if you were no longer chasing an ideal that was never yours to begin with?

I watched this unfold in my own marriage. There was a beautiful time in my marriage when my then-husband released the constructs of manhood and the prison it had been for him. He let go of the need to perform masculinity in the way he had been taught and instead embraced just being—existing and living life on the terms we created, not the ones imposed upon him.

And in that space of acceptance, something beautiful happened. He got comfortable in the role of being the caretaker of our family, and he was damn good at it—better than I was, if I’m being honest. And I, in turn, thrived as the primary breadwinner. That’s the freedom that radical acceptance offers—not just to ourselves but to everyone around us.

All of a sudden, he uncovered a passion for cooking, especially BBQ. Our home was filled with the most delicious meals. We had weekly in-house date nights where the stress of the world melted away. And summer? It never tasted so damn good.

My radical acceptance of myself offered him the freedom to do the same. That is what liberation does—it expands. It makes room.

Imagine a world where we could all simply be the best versions of ourselves in every moment. No guilt. No shame. No need to justify or explain. Just existing as we are, knowing that is more than enough.


Acceptance as Liberation

Supremacy culture thrives on making us feel like we always need to be better, do more, and prove our worth through productivity and self-discipline. We have been conditioned to believe that rest must be earned, that pleasure must be justified, and that we must always be striving for a more perfect version of ourselves.

But what if we challenged that?

Radical acceptance is the antidote to the exhausting cycle of self-improvement culture. It says: I am enough, right now, as I am.

It does not mean that we stop growing or evolving. It means that our worth is not contingent on that growth. That we are not only valuable when we are improving, achieving, or changing. It means that transformation happens best when it is rooted in self-compassion, not self-criticism—when it is an invitation, not a demand.

It means loving ourselves so deeply, so honestly, that we embrace the journey of evolving, shifting, creating, and making space without condition. It means understanding that our becoming is not a linear process with a finish line, but a cycle—one that allows for rest, for failure, for softness, for uncertainty.

Radical acceptance is knowing that we can desire growth while honoring who we are right now. That the version of you in this moment—the one who is still learning, still healing, still figuring things out—is already worthy of love, care, and belonging.

And maybe, if we truly believed that, we could release the tight grip of expectation. Maybe our bodies would soften. Maybe our breath would deepen. Maybe we could let go of the relentless pressure to always be better and instead, trust the natural unfolding of who we are becoming.

Because when we stop fighting ourselves, we find something even greater—freedom

✨ This is what liberation looks like.✨

Radical acceptance isn’t just about the self—it’s about creating space for those around us to do the same. It’s about breaking free from the molds we’ve been forced into and stepping into the fullness of who we are.

Imagine the ripple effect if we all embraced this—if we unlearned the need for perfection and reclaimed the right to simply be.

That’s the journey we’re on here. And I want you to be part of it.

🔒 The rest of this piece is for my paid subscribers—those who are committed to diving deeper into this work, engaging with these reflections, and integrating them into their lives.

If this resonated with you, I invite you to upgrade to a paid subscription. Not just to support this work (though that matters, too), but to step fully into a space where we are unlearning, rebuilding, and healing together. If finances are a barrier please email: Scholarships@DesireeBStephens.com

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