Day 10: Liberation Begins With Listening
Today marked a significant milestone—Day 10 of 100 Days of Community. As we reached this checkpoint, we explored the profound and often overlooked practice of listening. True listening is not passive—it is transformative. It dismantles supremacy culture, fosters trust, and lays the foundation for community healing. Today’s discussion reminded us that listening is where liberation begins.
Key Takeaways
👂 1. Listening Is About Understanding, Not Agreement
Listening doesn’t mean we have to agree with everything we hear. It means creating space for different perspectives and holding those truths, even when they challenge our beliefs.
Example: I shared how listening to diverse voices in her own family—especially during moments of disagreement—has led to deeper empathy and more meaningful connections.
Reflection: Where in your life do you tend to “listen to respond” instead of listening to understand? What shifts when you approach conversations with curiosity rather than defensiveness?
👂 2. Listening Dismantles Supremacy Culture
Supremacy culture thrives on domination, control, and power over others. Active listening subverts these dynamics by prioritizing collective wisdom over individual dominance.
Example: In workplaces, families, and communities, giving space to quieter voices often leads to transformative solutions. I highlighted how stepping back to allow others to speak can change the entire direction of a conversation.
Reflection: Who in your community or team is often overlooked in conversations? How can you create space for them to share their wisdom?
👂 3. Listening Builds Trust and Facilitates Repair
Marginalized communities often carry trauma from not being heard or believed. Rebuilding trust starts with listening—without dismissing, doubting, or centering ourselves in the conversation.
Example: I shared how listening, especially in conflict, can be a tool for repair. Trust is rebuilt when people feel seen and heard without judgment.
Reflection: Think of a relationship where trust has been eroded. What role could listening play in rebuilding that connection?
Highlights To Be Mindful Of
The Role of Ancestral Connection in Listening: Listening is not just for the present—it’s a skill that connects us to ancestral wisdom. “Our ancestors passed down their knowledge through stories. They understood that liberation is carried through listening and learning.”
Multiple Truths Can Coexist: Conflict often arises when we assume only one version of the truth exists. I encourage you to honor multiple truths, especially when addressing sensitive topics, saying, “Repair is possible when we acknowledge that everyone’s perspective holds value.”
Listening as an Act of Liberation: In a system designed to silence marginalized voices, the act of listening is radical. It decentralizes power and prioritizes lived experience over authority. “When you create space for others to speak, you are actively dismantling systems that thrive on domination.”
Practice Your Praxis:
Let’s take what we’ve learned today and put it into practice:
✨ Deep Listening Exercise: Choose someone in your life to have a conversation with—preferably someone you don’t always agree with. Ask an open-ended question and commit to listening without interrupting or offering solutions. Notice what emotions come up.
✨ Reflection Journal: Reflect on a time when someone truly listened to you. What did it feel like? How did it impact your relationship with them? How can you offer that same experience to someone else?
✨ Community Listening Practice: In your next group setting (whether at work, home, or in a community), take a step back and observe who is speaking the most. Then, invite someone who hasn’t spoken to share their thoughts.
Reminders:
📚 Don’t forget to grab my ebook: Dismantling Supremacy Culture: Understanding and Overcoming Its 15 Pillars for deeper exploration. It’s Pay What You Can: Get it here.
🌟 After today, access to 100 Days of Community will be for paid subscribers. If financial barriers exist, email scholarships@desireebstephens.com for a complimentary year-long subscription.
Looking Ahead to Day 11:
Tomorrow, we’ll explore How Supremacy Culture Disconnects Us from Rest—an often-overlooked pillar of oppression. How does rest become an act of resistance, and how can we integrate it into our community-building work?
In solidarity and liberation,
Desireé B. Stephens CSP-P
Educator | Counselor | Community Builder
Founder, Make Shi(f)t Happen
Join me tomorrow 9:30 am EST for my next live video in the app
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